Modern life
Several days ago my phone line in the house went dead. I called Verizon and arranged for an appointment today. They said that someone needed to be home from 8am to 6pm. Annoying but I cleared whatever calendar I had because we need both that line and the family line, especially at Thanksgiving. This morning I called hoping to get a more defined window of time for their repair visit. At this point they did some line testing and said they would likely be able fix it without coming in the house and so I did not need to be here. Since I had already arranged to be here and we needed the line I asked that I still be given a time window because I wanted to make sure that service would be restored. The Verizon agent then informed me that it may not be restored today. Me, "Why not?", Verizon Man, "Because sir, it's a line problem and we have over 1000 lines to restore.", Me, "But you're a big company with over 100,000 employees and I was told that it would be repaired. 1000 does not mean anything.", VM, "But it's Thanksgiving week and our employees do get to take vacations(patronizing tone creeping into VM's voice).", Me, "So is there a chance that it will be restored today.", VM, "Not really, maybe Friday.", Me, "Do you mind if I write about this on a blog.", VM, "No, the company encourages that(sarcastic tone emerges).", Me, "Ok, thanks for the help(sarcastic tone returned)".
Last Friday I received a notice from the New York State Department of Taxation. It said that after a review of my 2003, yes that's 2003, state taxes that I owed some additional tax as a result of an error on my return. There was an amount required for back taxes plus a cumulative 30% interest penalty for the money that I was unaware that I owed for the last two and a half years. The notice did say that I could dispute their claim if they received a letter from my brokerage firm disputing their findings, but the amount was relatively small and the detail of their review seemed to be a logical finding of an honest mistake. Who possibly has the time or patience to dig through their taxes of three years ago and to protest if it is not especially material. 2003? And penalty interest at almost double market rates? I signed the form. I wrote the check. I'll wait for the 2004 results in 2007.
We received a notice for a maturing CD at Chase a few days ago. It said take action or there will be an automatic rollover at their prevailing rate for the same maturity. Annoying since when we opened the CD I specifically requested that the automatic rollover feature, that classic retail bank ploy, be waived. They agreed, the system apparently did not. Chase's letter said that if we wanted to check the rate now offered that we call an 800 number. Did so, but they would not provide a rate for that maturity--said we had to speak to our branch. Went to the branch. The rate would be 4.25%, 85 basis points below the current market rate. Here's the trick. We originally entered into a 7 month CD because of the excellent rate that was at 4.4% slightly above market at that time. So now their plan with us and all others who entered into this rate was to catch us big time with a much lower rate. I do understand that most banks today of good size do really serious statistical and actuarial analysis of all of their retail bank offerings to deliver the most attractive appearing, most competitive(against their competitors) and most profitable product. These models can be managed to look at short term or longer term performance goals. Chase is obviously on the short term end at the moment. With a grace period of 10 days before a rollover locks in, they will have models that show what percent of customers will likely take the time to stop the rollover or look for a better rate at Chase or elsewhere. They, through their phone networks refusal to provide rates, discourage their customers from taking the time to focus on this and actually visit the branch during their work day. I am certain that their models actually take into account seasonality and, in this case, it is Thanksgiving week. These models are designed by highly educated mathematicians, not the guys and gals smiling behind the counters at your local branch. So I did take the time to visit the branch and, when I pointed out the ignoring of the no rollover request, the refusal of the suggested call center to provide rates, the ridiculously low rate that I found and the inconvenience of all this to the customer, my "personal" banker tried to explain away each point, and then finally said "you know banks are in business to make money". He said it twice in a row as if that was checkmate. I then noted that the best companies in any industry are in business to build long term relationships with good customers, of which I am one. "Just call me back and I'll take care of things anytime." he said. You may think that at each one of these points any bank that behaves this way is just incompetent, at every point of contact. Believe me, they are not.
Last Thursday we received delivery of a new double wall oven, a new induction cooktop, and a new dishwasher. We bought a used house, 1974 model, in 1997 and these appliances were vintage, ugly, and no longer working in some respects. People in real estate say that a definition of penny wise pound foolish if you ever plan to sell your house is to go cheap on a kitchen. So we're lucky enough to be able to afford top of the line stuff and we bought it. We can enjoy it now and someday later someone else will hopefully have helped us pay for it. It's beautiful looking stuff. The installation went perfectly. Unfortunately the oven and stove don't work. Actually three of the five fascinating electromagnetic burners on the stove do work, but two don't and we learned that at installation. After some discussion and my being arrogant enough to withhold paying for it, the retailer said that the manufacturer would replace the entire unit in a few weeks. During the weekend the ovens manifested their weaknesses. The time the ovens take to heat to just 350 degrees range from 25 to 45 minutes even as the colorful display screen says they are ready in about 5 minutes. We had some dropped cakes. The Max Broil setting turned a steak light brown after 2o minutes, soggy and still not fully cooked. The convection cooking baked cookies in different parts of the same oven from toasted, to just right, to barely cooked, all at the same time, an unusual feature. We left voice mails on the weekend, and when the dealer opened on Tuesday I called and received defenses on every issue. We then drove to the retailer for further discussion. I raised the issue of a 7 day or 14 day return policy and they acted as if that was unheard of. The attitude was almost one of "if you can afford this stuff you shouldn't be bothered by these minor issues". Our salesperson is knowledgeable but is one of those people who interrupts you mid-sentence and then will not stop saying whatever comes into her mind until she has to breathe again, usually after about five or six sentences. They finally believed that we were not cognitive dissonance crazies and arranged for a service rep to visit Monday to "recalibrate" the ovens computer. "Recalibrate". A word like that scares me. Long ago I had a friend who worked as a one man night manager of a small Trailways bus station and I would occasionally visit him at work. Whenever bags were lost he would, after some patient discussion on his part at least, always say they had a "tracer" on the lost luggage. That seemed to placate most people. I once asked him what a "tracer" meant. It means we don't know where the luggage is he said. "Recalibrate". We'll see. We haven't even tried the dishwasher yet because, after so much time with the oven and stove manuals, we haven't been able to force ourselves to pop the plastic on that one. After Thanksgiving dinner, a dinner which promises to be an adventure to produce, we will give it a try. I know that all of this will work out in some way, and I have documented all of this, dates, temperature tests, etc. in an e-mail to the dealer so I can make sure things will ultimately be the responsibility of the manufacturer, but what an agitation, especially obsessively going through the oven's computer-like manual for three days before finally deciding absolutely that we weren't stupid, the friggin' thing did not function right.
Quite a bit of these four episodes may seem like they have a theme of money and to a minor extent they do. But the real theme is agitation and distraction. Modern life. May you take a break tomorrow and have a Thanksgiving free from this modern life.
Last Friday I received a notice from the New York State Department of Taxation. It said that after a review of my 2003, yes that's 2003, state taxes that I owed some additional tax as a result of an error on my return. There was an amount required for back taxes plus a cumulative 30% interest penalty for the money that I was unaware that I owed for the last two and a half years. The notice did say that I could dispute their claim if they received a letter from my brokerage firm disputing their findings, but the amount was relatively small and the detail of their review seemed to be a logical finding of an honest mistake. Who possibly has the time or patience to dig through their taxes of three years ago and to protest if it is not especially material. 2003? And penalty interest at almost double market rates? I signed the form. I wrote the check. I'll wait for the 2004 results in 2007.
We received a notice for a maturing CD at Chase a few days ago. It said take action or there will be an automatic rollover at their prevailing rate for the same maturity. Annoying since when we opened the CD I specifically requested that the automatic rollover feature, that classic retail bank ploy, be waived. They agreed, the system apparently did not. Chase's letter said that if we wanted to check the rate now offered that we call an 800 number. Did so, but they would not provide a rate for that maturity--said we had to speak to our branch. Went to the branch. The rate would be 4.25%, 85 basis points below the current market rate. Here's the trick. We originally entered into a 7 month CD because of the excellent rate that was at 4.4% slightly above market at that time. So now their plan with us and all others who entered into this rate was to catch us big time with a much lower rate. I do understand that most banks today of good size do really serious statistical and actuarial analysis of all of their retail bank offerings to deliver the most attractive appearing, most competitive(against their competitors) and most profitable product. These models can be managed to look at short term or longer term performance goals. Chase is obviously on the short term end at the moment. With a grace period of 10 days before a rollover locks in, they will have models that show what percent of customers will likely take the time to stop the rollover or look for a better rate at Chase or elsewhere. They, through their phone networks refusal to provide rates, discourage their customers from taking the time to focus on this and actually visit the branch during their work day. I am certain that their models actually take into account seasonality and, in this case, it is Thanksgiving week. These models are designed by highly educated mathematicians, not the guys and gals smiling behind the counters at your local branch. So I did take the time to visit the branch and, when I pointed out the ignoring of the no rollover request, the refusal of the suggested call center to provide rates, the ridiculously low rate that I found and the inconvenience of all this to the customer, my "personal" banker tried to explain away each point, and then finally said "you know banks are in business to make money". He said it twice in a row as if that was checkmate. I then noted that the best companies in any industry are in business to build long term relationships with good customers, of which I am one. "Just call me back and I'll take care of things anytime." he said. You may think that at each one of these points any bank that behaves this way is just incompetent, at every point of contact. Believe me, they are not.
Last Thursday we received delivery of a new double wall oven, a new induction cooktop, and a new dishwasher. We bought a used house, 1974 model, in 1997 and these appliances were vintage, ugly, and no longer working in some respects. People in real estate say that a definition of penny wise pound foolish if you ever plan to sell your house is to go cheap on a kitchen. So we're lucky enough to be able to afford top of the line stuff and we bought it. We can enjoy it now and someday later someone else will hopefully have helped us pay for it. It's beautiful looking stuff. The installation went perfectly. Unfortunately the oven and stove don't work. Actually three of the five fascinating electromagnetic burners on the stove do work, but two don't and we learned that at installation. After some discussion and my being arrogant enough to withhold paying for it, the retailer said that the manufacturer would replace the entire unit in a few weeks. During the weekend the ovens manifested their weaknesses. The time the ovens take to heat to just 350 degrees range from 25 to 45 minutes even as the colorful display screen says they are ready in about 5 minutes. We had some dropped cakes. The Max Broil setting turned a steak light brown after 2o minutes, soggy and still not fully cooked. The convection cooking baked cookies in different parts of the same oven from toasted, to just right, to barely cooked, all at the same time, an unusual feature. We left voice mails on the weekend, and when the dealer opened on Tuesday I called and received defenses on every issue. We then drove to the retailer for further discussion. I raised the issue of a 7 day or 14 day return policy and they acted as if that was unheard of. The attitude was almost one of "if you can afford this stuff you shouldn't be bothered by these minor issues". Our salesperson is knowledgeable but is one of those people who interrupts you mid-sentence and then will not stop saying whatever comes into her mind until she has to breathe again, usually after about five or six sentences. They finally believed that we were not cognitive dissonance crazies and arranged for a service rep to visit Monday to "recalibrate" the ovens computer. "Recalibrate". A word like that scares me. Long ago I had a friend who worked as a one man night manager of a small Trailways bus station and I would occasionally visit him at work. Whenever bags were lost he would, after some patient discussion on his part at least, always say they had a "tracer" on the lost luggage. That seemed to placate most people. I once asked him what a "tracer" meant. It means we don't know where the luggage is he said. "Recalibrate". We'll see. We haven't even tried the dishwasher yet because, after so much time with the oven and stove manuals, we haven't been able to force ourselves to pop the plastic on that one. After Thanksgiving dinner, a dinner which promises to be an adventure to produce, we will give it a try. I know that all of this will work out in some way, and I have documented all of this, dates, temperature tests, etc. in an e-mail to the dealer so I can make sure things will ultimately be the responsibility of the manufacturer, but what an agitation, especially obsessively going through the oven's computer-like manual for three days before finally deciding absolutely that we weren't stupid, the friggin' thing did not function right.
Quite a bit of these four episodes may seem like they have a theme of money and to a minor extent they do. But the real theme is agitation and distraction. Modern life. May you take a break tomorrow and have a Thanksgiving free from this modern life.
posted by John Borden at 5:00 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home